搞笑的辞职报告(汇总4篇)
在现在社会,报告的用途越来越大,要注意报告在写作时具有一定的格式。报告的格式和要求是什么样的呢?下面是小编为大家带来的报告优秀范文,希望大家可以喜欢。
搞笑的辞职报告篇一
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搞笑的辞职报告篇二
“敬爱的刘老师:
您好!感谢您多年来对我的精心栽培,当班长的这几年中,我一直很珍惜这份荣誉,干好您交给我的每一份工作……但是,现在,我觉得班长越来越难当。您知道吗?每当我考试不尽人意,每当班级竞争赛拿不到第一,每当犯了一点小小的错误……我有多痛苦,我真羡慕不当班干部的那些同学,他们有多自在!这学期,爸爸妈妈也经常批评我:成绩不是最好,当什么班长……
刘老师,我知道我这样做实在对不起您,这实在不像一个优秀的学生所为,但是我实在太难熬了……请允许我辞职吧……”
第二天一大早,我怀着忐忑不安的心情,手里紧捏着那份长长的“辞职报告”,迈着沉重的步子来到办公室门口,。刚想跨进办公室的一刹那,我忽然有些后悔了,脑海中闪现一个念头:要是这份“辞职报告”交上去,从此以后班长不就没的当了吗?以后机会不知还有没有?……不行,这么犹豫干嘛……不!刘老师知道后会怎么想呢?会不会批评我……交!不交……我无法选择,这时候我只感到害怕控制着我的全身,使我寸步难行。办公室里传来刘老师亲切的声音:“俞梦佳,有什么事?”“啊?”我转过神来,把信往身后一藏:“没……没什么事,我是来找同学的。”刚说完就急匆匆地下楼去了。
晚上,我躺在床上,辗转反侧,思绪万千:真该死,我为什么没有勇气去交?如果交了,不就不用承受压力了吗?忽地,在我耳畔想起了主任在班干部会议上经常讲一句话:“当班干部也是学习,一定要珍惜,这是同学对你们的信任,这种信任是用金钱都无法买到的。在工作中也许会困难重要,要承受种种压力,但你们一定要知难而进,请大家记住,放弃就是失败,坚持就是胜利……”!对,我怎能放弃呢?这就是我要解决的难题呀!刘老师就是让我们在这样的环境里锻炼自己的毅力!想到这里,我心里一阵激动,我好幸运,幸运自己没有把“辞职报告”交上去。
最终,我没有把“辞职报告”交给老师。我把它偷偷地粘在我的日记本里,让它永远陪伴着我。我相信:这是我的第一份“辞职报告”,也是我的'最后一份。这份“辞职报告”记录着我的成长。
搞笑的辞职报告篇三
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搞笑的辞职报告篇四
刘总:
您好!
思考良久,还是打算提笔写下这封辞职报告。
很感谢能有机会与您共事,也是基于对您的认同,无论周围的压力有多大,无论其他人说什么,我不辩解,抗着,只希望努力是有结果的,是能帮助到您的,只希望有一天能看着广居民生逐步长大,成长为参天大树,只希望能有机会在树下纳凉。
而在眼下经济危机的形式下,大多数的地产公司的日子都很难过,市场的情形也不太乐观!结合公司现项目的情况,是不是还需要养这么多的人?是否该考虑人力成本的压缩了(xx年度截止10月份人事费用达3,898,428元,年人均数按40人计,人均人力成本97500元/年,很恐怖的数据了,如果再算边际贡献,极有可能会远远的低于行业类公司的边际贡献了)?从与各分管部门领导沟通的情况来看,建议如果在目前仅是山房项目的话,结合现在的工程进度安排与开发体量,人力需要大大的压缩,建议逐步进行减员计划(在目前而言,员工的合同将大量的于12月31日到期,对于确实不符合岗位要求的可以不再续签,这样可降低之后裁员的难度与裁员成本),对于山谷项目而言,因为也是分期启动的,实际可根据分期计划实行阶段性的人才扩充准备,当然这都只是我的建议而已,具体的还需要您再仔细的斟酌确定。
另外,在与各部门沟通的时候,中高层对公司未来的发展基本都感到迷惘,公司的战略目标不清晰,他们对自己的发展也感到迷惘,如果仅是山房项目而言,他们普遍认为仅需要十多二十人足亦(现在有56人),对于现在的人力感觉到甚是浪费,现在支撑他们留下的的在于您个人的人格魅力,但对于企业而言,这虽然是一种留人的方式,但却不是最好的方式,还是需要有企业的发展,企业的文化氛围来留人,这才是长久之计,尤其对于中高层管理人员而言,薪酬福利都是次要的,他们要的是发展与自我价值实现!对于企业的战略是需要您和高层讨论后确定的,对于企业的文化氛围我想这应是xx年度人事行政的工作重点吧。
同时,各部门还感觉到公司内部的流程不太畅通,这可能跟授权与部门职责切分有关吧,这个在咨询顾问来后会有好的解决方案了,就不多说了。
公司的组织架构与基本的管理制度在顾问焦老师的帮助下相信能很快的定下来了,虽然只有短短的二天,但焦老师的能力基本上可以说是获得了所有人的认可。之前所列的有关11月份的工作计划,特别是有关xx年人力规划、招聘/培训计划都跟公司发展、组织架构、部门岗位职责划分、现有人员的现状息息相关,我想这部份的工作也需要顾问的咨询成果出来后做出来的规划、计划才是具有针对性的,具有实操性的;有关薪酬绩效管理的办法,也需要在部门与岗位职责的划分清楚的情况下,岗位评价与绩效指标的设定才是科学有效的,所以这也需要基于顾问的结果来进行确定,但公司行政类的基本管理制度是可以先行的,毕竟这与公司的架构、职责划分的关系并不大,但却是规范日常行为的必须的法宝。
一直以来都在思考自己的发展与定位,因为地产,因为对您的认同,离开了所熟悉的it企业,从去年八月进公司算起,已经一年有余了,虽然努力着,却一路跌跌撞撞,工作没有任何的起色,人力资源的工作也没能推动,曾以为自己在hr领域还算专业,但现在看来却是真的非常失败。从人力到做您的秘书到再兼做人力与法律事务联系,工作内容在不断的变化增加着,揽的事儿越来越多,却一样都没有做好。自己也在思量,到底应该做什么,回归人力?但人力的工作却没能推动,失败!专门的从事秘书工作?却感觉自己的性格并不适合做秘书,也是非常的失败。为此看来,我于公司而言并不是合适的人选,是时候该有决定了,是时候离开寻找更适合的人来帮助您了,当然在走之前会先把接班人给找好,在新的人来之前我会尽量的把工作做妥当。
祝愿:xxxx,传承百年!